Portland Matchmaking | 8 Things You Must Have in Common

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There is a common phrase floating around the dating scene claiming that opposites attract.  But do they really?  Think about this: no matter who you’re dating, if you want to have a healthy relationship, you’re going to have to have a few things in common.

As much as people like to toss around the “opposites attract” phrase, it’s hard to imagine that it’s true when it comes to a long-lasting relationship.  Obviously, the complete opposite of “opposites attract” won’t work either, as you can’t have a partner who is identical to you.

You and your partner need to have some common ground along with some differences in order to make your relationship work.  After all, it’s those little differences that will teach you many different things in life.  Today, our Portland matchmaking experts here at Portland Singles Dating Service will show you the things you and your partner should have in common and why.

1. Children

One very important thing you want to ensure you agree on is children.  If one of you is set on having children while the other doesn’t want to, this will create a huge problem in your relationship.

If you continue to be with someone who wants nothing to do with children while you do, you’re just wasting your time.  At the end of the day, you’re going to end up resenting them because you won’t be happy with your life.  Additionally, there will be plenty of heated discussions and fights over this one.

2. Social Skills

If you are an extrovert and your partner is an introvert or vice versa, there are going to be many problems.  This can easily be worked out; however, you should share common ground on social skills and social outing ideas.  For example, if your idea of fun is partying on the weekends and your partner loves staying in, this is going to cause troubles in your relationship.

Your relationship is going to suffer because you each want to do something different.  Additionally, this will lead you to each do your own thing and never enjoy time together.

3. Marriage

Your views on marriage are also very important in a relationship.  You should both be on the same page when it comes to this matter.  After all, if one of you wants to get married while the other one doesn’t see a point in it, there are going to be problems.  If you’ve always dreamed of a big wedding with the works and your partner doesn’t believe in weddings, you’re going to be in for some major issues.

4. Monogamy

No matter what stage of the relationship you’re in, you and your partner must agree on this one.  The best way to discuss this is to simply make sure you’re both exclusive with one another.  If your partner is interested in casual dating while you are interested in settling down, this will create a problem.  It will drive a wedge between the two of you, cause jealousy issues, and a lot of stress.

5. Motivation

Is your partner lazy while you’re a go-getter?  Are you determined while they’re lacking ambition?  This will be a major problem for you.  No matter who in the relationship has the drive, motivation, and desire for success, if the other partner is lazy, there are going to be many problems.  In fact, resentment will soon grow as one partner feels they’re being held back and the other feels like they’re being left in the dust.  If you want to have a successful relationship, you both need to have the same drive, motivation, and desire for success.

6. Future Plans

Another important thing to have in common with your partner is shared future plans.  If your partner wants to travel the world and explore every country while you want to settle down in a country home away from it all, there will be problems.  You need to know where you both stand on future plans from the get-go so you’re on the same page.

If you want to have a successful relationship, your lives need to align.  This is crucial, especially if you’re the type of person who wants to settle down and start a family; otherwise, you’re just wasting your time and energy with the wrong person.

7. Lifestyle

On the same note as future plans, you and your partner also need to have the same lifestyles.  This is crucial, especially if you want to have a happy and healthy relationship that is long-lasting.  Does your partner enjoy waking up and going for a Sunday run, or are they just getting home from the bars on Sunday morning?  Do they like the outdoors while you hate it?  If so, this is going to create a problem.

You and your partner need to have similar lifestyles.  Additionally, by having compatible lifestyles, you’ll be able to spend more time together.

8. Hobbies

This one is a little difficult because not everyone in the world has the same hobbies and interests.  It is important to have your own hobbies, different from your partner’s, as it gives you time apart from each other.  However, it is also important to have a few shared hobbies so you can bond and spend quality time together.

In the end, you and your partner should make sure that you have the same values, beliefs, and relationship expectations.  As professional matchmakers, we know how difficult it is to meet someone with whom you share a lot in common.  Don’t invest your time and energy in someone if you don’t have shared beliefs, views, and future goals.

If you want to meet relationship-minded singles who are compatible with you, contact our Portland matchmaking experts today and let us assist you on your search.  We’ll get to know you on a personal level and use our proven 72 point compatibility test to ensure we only introduce you to people who are a good fit for you.

Simply fill out the private form at the top of this page to reserve your FREE 90 minute matchmaking consultation today.