Gresham Matchmakers | 5 Relationship Habits You Need to Nix
Our Gresham matchmakers are here to help you safeguard your relationship. Whether things have been rocky and you’re worried or you’re just trying to keep things sailing smoothly, this relationship blog is for you.
Habits can be extremely difficult to break, especially when they’ve developed over the course of a relationship. You know when your relationship is hurting from the effects of bad habits when you feel something isn’t right or is missing in your time with your partner. You can’t quite put your finger on the problem, and there may be no one to blame but yourself.
5 Worst Relationship Habits
Today, our Gresham matchmakers are going to show you relationship habits you need to break now.
- Trying to avoid disagreements.
It doesn’t sound exactly right, but hear us out. Fighting in a relationship can actually be a good thing. That is, if you know how to fight. Some think that avoiding fights with your partner means you care about them and don’t want to hurt them. But not wanting to fight is actually an indicator that both partners have checked out of the relationship.
Couples who don’t have any conflict are usually the ones that end up breaking up. Healthy fighting techniques include calling a timeout, asking your partner questions, and making requests instead of complaints or demands.
- Holding in your feelings inside.
Everyone knows the saying, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Well, that rule doesn’t apply to relationships. Some might think it’s easier and healthier to hold in your feelings rather than speaking about them. But couples are known for having less stress when they discuss their issues together.
If you hold your feelings in when it comes to problems in the relationship, you aren’t going to be able to discuss the bigger problems. Learning to express your feelings, whether good or bad, is actually healthy for your relationship.
- Trying to change your partner.
Trying to change your partner is an extremely toxic habit and will definitely hurt your relationship. In all reality, most people can’t be changed. However, there is a difference between growing as a person and trying to change your partner. When you want change your partner, you spend so much time focusing on them and criticizing them. Instead, try focusing on yourself and your own actions. It takes two people to make a healthy relationship.
It’s healthier to switch your focus away from your partner to figure out how to fix your relationship.
- Competing with each other.
When we talk about not competing with your partner, we aren’t talking about playing Monopoly or soccer at the park. A little healthy competition is healthy for your relationship and can actually bring the spark back. However, when both partners are more focused on being right than working together as a team, this habit of competing can actually be toxic.
- Keeping score.
What exactly does it mean to keep score? Well, if you bring up that time you went to three different stores to get your partner what they wanted for Christmas every time your partner doesn’t want to do something for you, you’re probably keeping scores in your relationship. And if both of you are doing the same thing, all you’re doing is hurting your relationship.
This also goes for bringing up past arguments and hurtful things you’ve said and done to each other. Drumming up past fights is going to demolish your relationship.
If you’re single and ready to meet relationship-mined singles in Portland, contact our Gresham matchmakers today. Let us introduce you to local singles with whom you share long-term compatibility. Let us help you find your dream partner!
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